So you're interested in getting married and all the wonderful things that can come with having a husband? Of course, there is no guarantee that you'll find someone, but there are certain things you can to do make it more likely. Make sure that you're getting out there in the world, that you're trying new things, and building your confidence.
To get started finding your Mr. Right see step 1.
To get started finding your Mr. Right see step 1.
- 1Get out there. You aren't going to meet the man of your dreams by sitting home and watching bad reality shows. You have to get out and start meeting people. You have to enlist your friends and family in helping you meet new people. One of these guys you meet could be the one.[1]
- It's important to do things that are outside of your comfort zone. Not only will this widen the net for potential mates, but it will also make you more interesting. For example: if you're usually a bookish type person, try going out to a concert, or take rock climbing lessons. You'll meet all different types of people, who in turn will introduce you to an ever-widening network of potential husbands.
- Make sure that you tell family and friends that you're looking for a relationship and ask them to set you up with a guy they think you might like. Family and friends can be great for that sort of thing and will usually have your best interests at heart.
- Try different dating styles. Make an online dating profile and see what turns up from that (after you weed out the online dating morons) and try out blind dates that have been set up by your friends and family. A large proportion of married people met their significant other through mutual friends or through family.
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2Practice confidence. Confidence is that trait that can get you more dates than any subjective "attractiveness" is going to. Fortunately, unlike physical appearance, confidence is a trait that can be learned and developed. The more you try it, the more confident you will get, and the more men will be intrigued by your confidence.
- Fake it 'til you make it. The great thing about confidence is that you can fake it and trick your brain into actually believing that you're confident. Start small--wear those heels you love, but think you look silly in, or that bright red lipstick--and work your way up to bigger acts of confidence--asking a guy for his number, buying a guy a drink, etc.
- Don't compare yourself to other people, especially other women. Someone is always going to be better-looking, more successful, with better relationships. You need to focus on the good things about yourself, rather than how you compare to others.
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3Present yourself effectively.Dating can be a bit like marketing, or like looking for a job. You have to learn how to present yourself in a way that draws guys in. This doesn't mean that you give up who you are, it simply means that you know how to get across the best, and simplest, sides of who you are.[2]
- Draw up a list of good qualities. If you're having difficulties (and a lot of people with self-esteem issues do) have a trusted friend help you out there. For example: you might say that you're "a good listener," "funny," "a fabulous hiker," "up for anything," etc. They have to be positive qualities!
- Have an image. Pick three of the things that you put on your list and create an image based on these. Again, this does not mean sacrificing who you are as a complex individual, but it is a shorthand way to present yourself and for your friends/family to talk about you with potential dates. For example: using the above qualities you present yourself as "a funny, outdoors person, who's up for anything."
- Dress for success. If you're going in for a job interview you're not going to be super slovenly. You don't want to dress yourself super uncomfortably and you want to make sure you're dressing for the occasion (dressing to the nines to go to the gym is probably not the best idea).
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4Be open. It's really important that you don't limit your options for dating by focusing exclusively on "dating" places (like the bar, parties, etc.). People meet their significant others in all kinds of places, and you'll need to be open to that possibility.[3]
- For example, if you're on a long train ride, maybe make eye contact with that guy across the train you think is cute. If you're really bold, strike up conversation.
- This is also why it's so important to get out there and do things. You could very well meet that special someone at the park, at the library, on a plane to somewhere far away, at your local charity benefit.
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5Weed out the bad ones. If you're putting yourself out there, marketing yourself effectively, then you're going to start garnering interest. Now's the time to start weeding out the ones that aren't going to cut it: the players, the really strange ones, the ones who wouldn't make good husbands, etc.[4]
- Don't be so picky. While you are trying to get rid of the ones who won't work, you should also consider giving a chance to guys that you might not normally go for. This doesn't mean that creepy guy you met at the bar, but it does mean maybe trying out someone who doesn't have rock hard abs, or who dresses in a manner you aren't sure you like. You never know what might come out of that sort of relationship.
- Some things to look out for in a potential mate: he blames women for everything (eventually he'll start to blame you, too; run away from the "you're not like other women" guy; bonus points for derogatory language); a guy who's obsessed with looks (your looks will "fade" as you get older and he'll start looking at the younger crowd); someone who doesn't want to be exclusive (it's unlikely that he'll ever commit to being exclusive; you can do better).
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6Be realistic. Remember, there is no guarantee that you're going to find a husband. Even if you do, he's probably not going to look like a movie star, treat you like a queen, and devote his every second to your needs. That doesn't mean you won't find someone whom you love and are passionate with.(Wikihow.com)These steps work ooo....U never can tell.#chysugar
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